The last few chapters in the book we looked at methods of
communication and the
rod. This chapter is titled
Embracing Biblical Methods: Appeal to the Conscience. If we simply tell our children that they did
something wrong and punish them with a spanking we have missed out on a great opportunity
to help our children learn how to reason. God has given us all, including
children, the capability to reason or determine what is right and wrong. In the last chapter we looked at scripture
that supports the use of the rod, but we do not want to miss out of what the
other parts of the verses in Proverbs 23 are saying:
“Don’t
let your heart envy sinners…” vs. 17
“…keep
your heart on the right path…” vs. 19
“Listen
to your father, who gave you life…” vs. 22
“Buy
the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline, and understanding” vs. 23
“My
son, give me your heart…” vs. 26
Giving a spanking is a good way to get a child’s attention
and may help them remember to avoid that same offence in the future but it is
the molding of the conscience that address the issues of the heart and fills the heart with God’s truth. We should be careful to fill our children’s
heart with Gods truth and not lies that stem from wounds of our own, or anger
and frustration. It is about dealing
with the root of the problem and not just the surface issue. We know that God is the ultimate judge of our
hearts, but God has placed us in a position to judge our children correctly and
on His behalf. Our children don’t know God yet.
What a responsibility. God help us!
“You address the heart by exposing sin and appealing to the
conscience as the God-given right and wrong. “ (Tripp 118)
In the book Tripp gives an example of a boy who took money
from the offering plate and his father caught him. The boy’s father took him to
Tripp’s office and made him give him the money back. He gave the $2 back. Basically Tripp presents the gospel to the
young boy and express his thanks to God that he was caught in sin and able to deal
with the boys actions and not live in sin. The boy then began to cry and handed
them a $20. Tripp was able to appeal to the boy’s heart through the gospel. So,
it became a time of dealing with the issue of his heart instead of just going
through the motions!
Being the children’s director at our church God has allowed
me to talk to kids in an effort to change their behaviors/attitude of their
heart in class. I recently had a parent say, “I don’t know what you said to
him, but there is a night and day difference”.
I told her that it was all God because all I did was tell the boy how
much God loved him and that God has a plan for his life and how his behavior
did not line up with that AND man have I been praying for him! God does amazing things when we let HIM,
right?
The gospel and scripture speak to our hearts. It is living
and active. Use it!
Redemption is an important part in correcting, just as it is
in the gospel. If we focus on the cross in discipline, then when we correct we
are revealing our need for Jesus, because we are sinners. We cannot have
redemption from our sins without Him. It
is an internal transformation. If we simply work on the outward appearance and
simply reward good behavior and punish bad behavior we are raising children no
different that Pharisees. The life we are called to live we cannot live up to
ourselves. We need Jesus. Focus your discipline on Christ.
